“So long as you have food in your mouth, you have solved all problems for the time being.” -Franz Kafka. I have been sitting this quote for a while. It really means a lot of things to me. I have loved food my entire life, the nickname my mom gave me as a baby was Bumble Bee because I would happily hum while ate away.
Growing up I had quite a reputation for my large appetite, and I struggled with my weight, both things giving me a complex about food that I still struggle with. My family was busy growing up, this translated to many hamburger helper style dinners. I also went and back and forth between households, and a lot times, that meant getting fast food on the way. Fast forward to December 2008, at my heaviest and biggest, I set a Resolution for New Year’s to move beyond diets and meal replacements to take baby steps in a new direction in life. I started eating more whole foods, and cracked open my favorite cookbook to start learning how to make things from scratch. I gained a new appreciation for food, and for how baked goods are prepared-not my forte. In 4 years I had only lost about 40 lbs, and my clothes size varied depending on the day of the week. I woke up the morning of my 25th birthday feeling more than hungover, my joints were so stiff and aching, my back throbbed, I felt more tired than when I went to bed, my feet felt broken, I was nauseous, but also had diarrhea, and I was starting to see white spots in my vision. I was living with these symptoms every day. I had to try 3 times to get all the way through my elimination diet and work with my doctor, I lost almost 100 pounds and I learned a lot about my own body and how it reacts to foods. It was the longest year of my life, but I learned more and made the most progress after trying so hard for years. Today, my weight is only fluxuacting because I am still nursing my son, and I can feel the difference of just a couple of pounds and how hard it can weigh on my frame. I know now, that I am not a lazy person, but that my body was tired, and working too hard to keep up. There is this cycle that we all go through when we learn something new, where we make great strides and changes and then begin to take for granted what we know, and have to be reminded of why we needed that lesson the first time around. Here we are again, dealing with gut health in the family and learning about our bodies react to the foods we put in them. Knowing that something can make me sick, or could kill someone, just by being on the same surface, literally keeps me home most of the time, so to be able to feel safe enough to eat somewhere is a big deal to this family. It is a luxury that I feel most people take for granted.